Calm After a Storm (Phebe)

 CALM AFTER A STORM

By Phebe

It gives me immense joy to share few reflections on the study on Jonah that concluded recently. The first time I listened to the story of Jonah was from my mom who narrated the story to me. As a kid, I could not comprehend God’s boundless love and compassion then, but what fascinated me about the story was that Jonah was swallowed by a big fish and was still alive in the fish’s belly even after 3 days. I wondered how he managed as it must have been dark, filthy with an unbearable stench! As I grew up and started studying the book of Jonah in depth, I could understand that God accomplished His purposes through Jonah even though it meant God dealing with love and grace on a rebellious and unwilling heart.

At a personal level, the past four weeks of study on Jonah had been quite retrospective. It made me reflect on my own self, realizing how on many occasions, I had been none other than Jonah, doing things that I felt was right and what was pleasing in my sight. God in His mercy and love, sought after me and brought me back to His fold. In introspection, I had disobeyed God to gratify my pleasures and interests, was stubborn to hold on to my plans and lived my life as if everything around me was perfect.

Just as Jonah, who could sleep peacefully amidst a heavy storm, I thought I was right with my decisions and was quite oblivious to what was happening around me and the disaster that I was heading to. A day came when I had to face the consequences of my disobedience to God. Just as Jonah was thrown out in the raging sea because of his disobedience, I was thrown out of my comfort zones to face trials, failures and disappointments in life. I could only cry out to God in desperation during those challenging times. The Lord heard my cry and dealt with me, not according to my Sin and iniquities, (Psalm 103.10) but by His loving kindness. In spite of my short comings, He did not to give up on me. Through these testing times and trial, I realized that He was the potter and I’m the clay. He was breaking me, moulding me , shaping me to be a useful vessel in fulfilling the purposes of God.

As a result of my disobedience to God, I had to experience extreme pain, loss, suffering and found myself in helpless situations. Like Jonah, I too realized that only God could bring me out of this situation with His power and might. I surrendered it all to my Saviour. He in His wisdom and sovereignty intervened in my life and taught me what it is to humble myself and submit to His way. It was through these valley experiences, I learnt to say, “Not my will Lord, but thy will be done in my life, not my ways, but your ways, not my desires, but yours be done”.  No matter how pathetic our circumstances seem to be, no matter how intense our pain could be, the power of God is demonstrated by His ability to accomplish His will in every situation, through any means He chooses in order to glorify Himself. God’s power is centered on His will and His glory. His power is transformational. We just need to obey His command.

Pastor was sharing about how God is ever merciful, and He doesn't forsake or forget His children. While I was listening to him, I could not help but thank God.  He graciously sought after me, pursued me, even though I have wronged Him, disappointed and grieved His heart through the careless and callous life that I lived. Just as how God was persistent in giving Jonah a second chance and when Jonah took himself up on it, the result was an eternal impact on many people’s lives. Likewise, God graciously pardoned my misdoings and granted me a second chance to submit to His will that built me afresh.

We moved to Kolkata in 2017, when my husband was transferred. God brought us to KCF, where we enjoyed fellowship with fellow believers and were actively involved in various ministries that God led us to, we thought Kolkata was ‘the ideal place to live’ but our joy was short-lived in the “city of joy”. My husband had to move again to Chennai on a job change. This irked me and I could not come to terms with the idea of moving out of Kolkata. I even prepared myself to stay back in Kolkata with my daughter, assuming that my husband would find a job back in Kolkata and join us. After much struggle, we submitted to God’s plan and decided to move to Chennai. Only then did we realize the plan of God in moving us here. My dad who was staying with my sister in Chennai fell ill and needed personal care, my sister, who has a full time job was finding it hard to meet these challenges. It was exactly at this time, God brought us to Chennai so that dad could move with us and we could take care of him full time. We seldom understand God’s plan and purposes, but our God is a God who knows the end from the beginning. On many occasions, I had been like grouchy Jonah who complained about the paths that God took me through but now when I look back, I can’t thank God enough for the wonderful way in which He has protected us, led us and helped us experience His abounding love and grace even in minor details of our lives.

It was a ‘whale’ of problems that led me to the shores of God’s will!